Confused...

Question

I am seeking a separation and divorce from my husband of 13 years. We are trying to separate as friends for we have two children, girl 11 and boy 8. He wants the children to live with him. We have been wanting to separate - we tried it once and my children were so hurt that we tried again.

It didn't work, so now, I want to move back to NC, and he wants to stay in NY and have the children. I don't mind because I don't want to move my children again. I am not working yet and he is. I have a very good male friend to live with to share expenses until I get a place, and we want to date.

Can my husband and I write up our own agreement and have it notarized, or do we have to go through a lawyer? I don't have the money to see a lawyer about this.....about 500.00. My husband says he is willing to raise them, but I am a little leery of him going after me later for abandonment.

Answer

You should be very leery! With child custody at stake, you must consult with an attorney. Your situation is far too complex to try working it out on your own.

Shop for a lawyer who offers a sliding scale, go through your local legal aid organization, or borrow the money, but don't try to work up the divorce agreement on your own. You could lose your children.

~ Linda C. Senn

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